A Little Less Personal

So, there was a far more personal version of this entry up before - but I had a small panic-attack and deleted it. Here's to being impersonal!

My Grandpa Dickau (who, by the way, is not my 'real' grandpa) always tells me "It's not the one you can live with, it's the one you can't live without. Find that person and you're finished searching."

Great advice! But how do you know which person is the one you can't live without. I mean you COULD live without anyone if you were forced to - so is it a matter of who you would least like to live without?? I don't get it.

I think other people have probably been in the same position; you've had a few serious relationship's which could have easily ended in 'happily ever after' but due to timing, life choices, etc they didn't. So then is it more a matter of readiness for that one big cliff jump?

I've had two relationships which I was sure (at the time) would end in marriage and for whatever reason they didn't, yet they still have yet to be entirely ruled out (one moreso than the other). Is that due to my own inability to disconnect from those people and my insecurity that I'll never find anyone else or is it because one of them really could be 'the one'?

I know, I know; when you're unsure of something and you need advice - ASK GOD! But I've asked, and asked - maybe I'm just not listening.

When I was taking the Alpha Course (which is amazing and I highly recommend it) through my Church, I remember having a conversation about how God will bring you to your limits; take you to the point where you don't think you can handle anymore and then He will answer all your questions and grant you peace. A test of your devotion to Him. I find myself wondering if I have not succeeded in that test and perhaps that's why I have no answers or peace in this.

I always wonder if this is God teaching me patience - it is a virtue. Or perhaps since He knows me better than I know myself, He is giving me time to work on myself - before I start working on an 'us'. The old addage 'You can never truely Love anyone else, until you Love yourself'.

Honestly, this could just continue in circles for hours - the question's never end.

Just something I've been thinking about. I guess I need to take some advice from a little diddy called 'Stand Still' by The Isaacs. Yes, The Isaacs from The Gaither videos - so I watch The Gaither videos with my Daddio, so what - some of those people can really sing! Anyways, very good song "When you’re faced with life’s decisions, not sure which way to go, Stand still and let God move".

Maybe I'll just 'run-on-the-spot'; don't wanna start packin' on the pounds till AFTER I find the man.